Posted on 2/15/2008
In trying to improve our lives, attain greater success, and reach our goals, we try to find ways to improve ourselves. We try to become smarter, more efficient, or even more popular.
There are several pitfalls on the road to self-improvement and without knowing it, you may be doing things that will stunt your personal and professional growth. Read through the list below and see if you are holding yourself back.
* Earn Your Own Praise: Seeking validation from others rather than taking pride in your own accomplishments can be dangerous. To quote Dale Carnegie, “The person who seeks all their applause from outside has their happiness in another’s keeping.”
These are wise words. If we receive all of our self-worth and approval from others, then you are giving away your own emotional control. You will find yourself experiencing highs and lows in your self-confidence based upon the input you receive from others.
Instead of falling into this trap, seek approval from within. Take part in activities that are important to you, put forth your very best efforts, and set goals that will make you proud to accomplish. Recognize when you are doing a good job, living up to a promise, and are just simply being true to yourself. Learn to like yourself, and the world will follow suit.
* Continue Your Education: Life is an adventure that teaches us valuable lessons every step of the way. If you close your mind to the wisdom life has to offer you, then you are setting a very large obstacle between yourself and self-improvement.
Keep your mind open to new learning opportunities. They may come from a friend, from a boss, or even from your children. In fact, sometimes children teach us the most important lessons of all, such as compassion and forgiveness.
Hand in hand with an open mind comes the initiative to act. All of the knowledge in the world does you no good if you fail to put it to good use. You will find, though, that as you increase your knowledge base and gain new experiences, you will carry yourself with a confidence that will be noticeable to everyone around you.
When you prove you are willing to learn and can apply your knowledge appropriately, others will begin seeking you out for advice. Even your boss may come to depend upon your particular expertise. You have the chance to reach your goals and experience tremendous success if you stay out of your own way.
* Set Reasonable Goals: There is nothing wrong with wanting it all. Just realize you cannot have it all today. Learn to exercise patience and work toward your goals in small chunks rather than bite off more than you can chew.
When you set unrealistic goals you are setting yourself up for potential failure and frustration. Instead, determine what your main goals are in life, then break them down into smaller parts. Use those parts as a progressive road map towards reaching your major goals.
As you progress down your road to success, do not allow setbacks to kill your motivation. Giving up on your goals will hinder your chances for self-improvement and will be detrimental to your confidence.
* Commit: When you decide to take steps towards achieving a goal or improving yourself, commit yourself fully to the effort. Do not tinker with the idea, treating it like a hobby. If you do not take the effort seriously, you will give up the first time you encounter difficulty. As with any worthwhile goal in life, you need to give yourself over fully to the effort.
If you encounter setbacks, do not get discouraged and give up. Instead, assess the situation and try to understand why you had a setback, then develop a plan to overcome the obstacle. Doing so will build your confidence and make it easier to leap the next hurdle when it appears.
By taking responsibility for your own goals, your own achievements, and your own sense of self-worth, you will become a more reliable partner in work and in life. You will greatly enhance your chances for self-improvement and success, and you will eliminate the highs and lows that occur when you put the responsibility for your happiness in the hands of others.
Draw up a written plan with measurable landmarks towards reaching your goals, then be sure to recognize your accomplishments and give yourself the praise you deserve.
Written by David B. Bohl of Slow Down Fast.
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