Big Brother 12: The 12th Coming

Successful podiatrist Andrew is a "Successful podiatrist," which is fortunate, given our ever-growing number of failed podiatrists that you see living by the highway, in cardboard shoeboxes. He's also successfully Jewish, and he stated: "I'm not going to compromise my Judaism." What does he think Big Brother will try to get him to do? Celebrate Christmas? Not keep kosher? Buy retail?

Last year's winner was the hopelessly stupid and monumentally ignorant Jordumb. Hopefully losing this year is Jordumb's clone, Britney, a "blonde" from Arkansas with a drawl so thick, just hearing it can cause IQ loss. Although from a town smaller than my house, she claims to have "Big-City Game." Turns out she was referring to her Monopoly set, "Back Woods Shanty Town Edition."

Tall, muscular, narcissist Hayden is from Arizona, and given his Aryan Youth looks and magnificent body, my guess is that the Arizona Gestapo aren't stopping him to ask for his papers too terribly often. He lives on the convenient side of Racial Profiling. Hayden says he is: "the most competitive person you will ever meet," but then, he has no idea whom I will ever meet, nor is he likely to find out behind the racist barriers of Arizona. He zhongjibo added: "The ladies love me. That's what's going to take me far in this game." I believe some ladies love him, also some men, but no one loves him as much as he does.