I think I was a good record, who I have always been a trip, constantly to many places, let yourself feel so trace of happiness, and then in a recall, dead to the last the rest of the pain, let me feel the unprecedented despair, my heart, again and again and being hurt. I can only carries on, sometimes when I hearts hurt, I will be silent looking out the window and looked at the world is a very big? But were themselves so small, I think, keep thinking, let oneself proud wither away, I have many times in the past all want to forget about, but many times of failure, may I really want to the sad? I want to get to that hurt in others. Others have been to you want things, hurt me. Injury to break to, or hurt yourself! This way of life, perhaps are not everyone wants? But can also how, this way of life has been doomed, regardless of the life, want to, no matter how road, go. Everything seems really has been doomed? When I very hard very hard, the crack of pain but a knife knife knife cut open a my heart, let me are sad.
Happiness who have had, but happiness that behind the pain, who can go to bear? I ask yourself, I can really to go to bear? It is not, and I used to, I often a person, often stunned, to think a lot of a lot of things, life, to the past and the future, continuously to even think about, think the future for me, really confused, don't know what my future should go down? When I think about here, in the heart of that kind of fear always still remain in the heart, how to wipe it off? To the last I meaningless persistence will??? What???
That day, my sister and I give I hair a message, "elder brother, for love, I really do not hold to, each time tell yourself, be strong, but tears again and again across my cold, wet face my pillow, with tears to sleep, every time I see other couples so much better I really envy, the heart really hurts so much." I saw my younger sister sent me a message, that the taste of bitterness and hot on the heart, actually who is not so, insist to can not keep on, even if it can't insist, also want to brimming with tears, don't let it flow! That so-called self-esteem, is so low. Life is like a table, above filled up with tea set and a cup, everyone chose tea service, and in the end, tea service is broken, and own or a cup. I keep hope, and then continuously disappointment, sometimes I also don't know my heart in addition to these, the rest of the will??? What??? Picked up the phone, will be in the moment the outbreak of the sad, heavy hit the mobile phone keyboard, "hang on, can't insist, then how again? At least you tried very hard to, even to the end with injury, I know you also insisted, if to the last you still broke up, you can't cry, because he has not worth see you sad that one side, you have to learn to know, there are the results of the face, if you really can't hold to the last, and fell down, and I'll go pick you up, smile and tell you, you not is never just one person, you also have a lot of can stay with the people around you."
When put down the phone, ear melody suddenly and sounded the, that a LinYuQun "future first stop", whenever I hear this song, my heart just as knife general pain, tears are not consciously stroke fall down and looked up and looked at the empty room, the in the mind really lonely, sat in the corner of I screwed up, tell yourself, can not so vulnerable, lit a cigarette, take my lonely is, out of my troubles is. Smoke ceaselessly in room diffusing, then slowly away, never disappear. Don't really know the source of sad when can to stop? One day, three after 90 young people, sit empty in the classroom, listen to the sad music, thinking about your own life, think to the future is how of confusion, and when the music stopped in the 1: "a person walked too much, tears, who is not stopped the love praise came down to me" heart but so pain.
Whenever the dismissal, all people have sneaked away, I am the only one left, opened the MP3, wearing headphones, lie prone on the desks, such a man listens quietly, until a long time. Really like immersed in the feeling of, return to absolute being, the sun was already soon came down from the mountain, may also is only the feeling, and will let my in the mind be very calm, the night that winter, I was walking alone in the streets, and the man in the street continuously by, and said that moment, suddenly see the familiar face, it is her, I used to love her deeply, but she's left hand but being tightly lead, is a very tall boy, is that what she had mentioned him? At that moment she ases if to also saw me, and she was quickly tight low head, as did not see me, in the shine of the light, vaguely can see her face, the distance from us in a few meters under, her breath is still so familiar, but I felt like she was a changed man, think is so strange, before she is do not laugh, but she now but laugh as much, perhaps she really is happy than before! Why would I go to unnecessary care about her? We now seem what relationships are not? So passed each other, who also didn't stop, looking back, the heart is now a malicious to pain, the roadside mobile phone shop again as if out of xiao second xuan that one of the most familiar stranger ", this song and reminds me of, she and my past, is so miss, I think she's now in so well, has won't need me, and why I go to care about before we the love between, forget it! At least we ever also very happy, raise head, the tree leaves more than half of blocking the sky, the wind not consciously to blows, the leaves kept in the air the swing, heart suddenly feel a bit and desolate, I really have habit so no one of the company's life, that someone with taste, I have for a long time did not, close your eyes, no matter be sad, or sad memories, let I slowly in such memories die, the tears in the light of the shining light, it is so clear, blame we initially, the love of so wonderful, and by the end of the separate, but then let people heartache.
