The best kid smells of all time

we're not going to have more children When we talk about great child smells, it's always a CONGER chemistry experiment, with the kid acting as a catalyst for something completely new to my senses. When I stick my nose in a jar of peanut butter, it's not a particularly wonderful experience. But when my 2-year-old's head smells like peanut butter, I'm really smelling Skippy Creamy Peanut Butter + Pheromone X, which is a slightly different and infinitely more awesome scent. (Pheromone X, I suspect, is nature's way of making sure I don't throw my children out of the house when they break my iPhone. "I'd sell him to the gypsies if he didn't smell like Play-Doh ...")

As my kids grow older, and I realize we're not going to have more children, each of these kid smells become a little more heartbreaking. In a few years, as my boys approach puberty, Pheromone X is going to be replaced by whatever pheromone makes teen boys smell disgusting most of the time.

Hopefully by then my plan to develop and market Baby Head Cologne (see below) will be finalized, and I can douse my children with that each morning.